Pseudonymns (a.k.a. The Cast)

I've decided that it would be a good idea to not use any real names in my blog. In this age of identity theft, it's a good idea to minimize your Internet footprint. The less there is on the web that can be directly affiliated to you, the better.

Besides, everyone listed here will probably be the only people reading this anyways. You all know who you are, so it's not like I really even need to name names.

That being said, here's a quick list of people that will likely pop up in posts. I've made annotations to describe their relationships. If you're reading this and you're upset that I didn't add you to the list, send me an email with the alias you would like me to use for you. I'm not going to guarantee that I'll use your suggestion, but I'm lazy - so it's very likely.

Family

• Me
• Baby - my wife
• Sweetie - my daughter
• Captain Cavy - brother
  
• Mom
• Dad
• Granny and Pa - Dad's parents, Pa is deceased
• Grandma and Grandpa - Mom's parents, both deceased
• Mr. Dad - father-in-law
• Mrs. Mom - mother-in-law
• Fargo - brother-in-law
• Grandmere and Avo - Mrs. Mom's parents, Grandmere is deceased
• G-ma and G-Pa - Mr. Dad's parents

I also have two step-parents, two step-brothers, and (at least) one step-sister. I doubt I'll be talking much about them though, so I haven't created aliases for them yet.

Friends

• Polar - fraternity brother
• Snappy - ex-co-worker
• Bullseye - fraternity brother

I swear, I really do have more than three friends. I just don't feel like creating aliases for all of them right now. I'll make them as I need them and they'll be added to the list ad hoc.

Co-Workers

• Homestar - president / CEO / owner
  
• FattyMo - head developer
  
• Darius - senior developer
  
• Mannster - project manager
  
• SilentSun - support manager
  
• Mitko - developer
  
• Capt. GayBar - business manager
  
• Flip - graphics designer
  
• Narrator - senior graphics designer
  
• Snail - project manager

All job titles are nebulous. They can (and probably will in a few cases I can think of) be disavowed by the holder at any time. They might also be supplemented by rude and impolite pejoratives at any time the mood hits me.

Is it fixed yet?

I perform customer support as part of my job, so I completely understand that debugging can frequently be a multi-step process. What I don't understand is why when I purchase a warranty on some expensive item and that item decides that it wants to stop working, why it takes not only soooo stinking long to have someone come out to fix it, but also why it can't get fixed correctly on the first visit. Or if not the first visit, why the second visit can't be scheduled briefly after the first instead of another week or more after the first visit.

Perhaps some background to my ire.

Our washer stopped working sometime shortly after New Years. Being the procrastinator that I am, I waited a week before calling Sears to make a service request. Now, be advised that we didn't notice the washer was broken until we needed to do laundry in the first place. After making the call, they gave me a week until a technician could come out. The tech came out, diddled around with the controls for a little bit, took off the face plate (which, as a side note, gave me a bad idea about doing a custom paint job for the washing machine. Washer with flames. w00t) and announced that the control board was fried and we needed a new one. It would take 3-4 days for the part to arrive, so he scheduled to come back a week later.

One week later (yesterday, this is week 3 since it actually stopped working) he comes back to install the control board that was delivered to our house. Off comes the face plate, everything gets detached and then attached. Push the start button and ...

nada.

Same as before. "Hmm," he contemplates. "Let's try this." He props up the front of the washer on two screwdriver handles (which fell off once and damn near crushed his hand. I had to shake my head at that one) and removes the lower plate, exposing another control board; this time the controller for the actual motor. Deciding that perhaps this is where the problem lies, he goes to his truck to grab a spare motor control board (or sure, he had that but not the first control board ... go figure) and changes that out. Push the start button and ...

zilch.

Now granted, at least this time it did something different. Whereas before, it would try to run a few time in a row; this time it just beeped and shut off. Clearly frustrated, he tries holding in the start button and ...

lights flash and a loud "Pop".

There's something both amusing and terrifying about watching a trained professional hurry in a constrained panic to pull an appliance plug out of the wall. At this point, I decided that it was better for my sanity to spend the rest of my time downstairs trying to make out a grocery list instead of watching him scratch his head while staring at my, what I'm sure was later described as possessed, washing machine.

After a little while longer, he comes trudging down the stairs with his tools in hand. "What's the verdict?" I nonchalantly quip. "You need a new wiring harness, and that's a two man job." he says, quite solemnly. I'm thinking, "It takes two guys to put in some twist-ties?" I think it, I don't say it. Evidently, the harness is more like a conduit - a sheath with a whole bunch of control wires running through it. His hypothesis is that one or more of the wires in the harness are exposed and/or shorting out - causing not only the wonderful POP we heard but also the previous issues as well.

"What we'll do is get another new control board, a new motor control board and wire harness. That's pretty much all the electrical components in your washer, since this is definitely an electrical problem" he says, looking full of optimism. "So that's going to be another 3-4 business days for the parts and a week until they're installed?" I ask, already knowing the answer.

"That's right."

"My wife is going to castrate me and there's nothing you or I can do about it," I mutter to no one in particular.

"I'm sorry, what was that?"

"Hmm? Oh, nothing."

So, as of now we still don't have a working washing machine. Our last trip to the laundromat ended with 5 bags of wet, but clean, laundry and a rather impatient patron who decided to hover over Baby and I while we were waiting for our loads to finish because evidently her hallway carpet runner simply had to be laundered RIGHT THIS SECOND!!

I hope this helps to explain my earlier comments. This isn't the first time we've been strung out on a warranty. Our TV took over 3 months to be fixed and was eventually replaced as a lemon and then the replacement broke, but admittedly was quickly fixed.

As my final note: Why can't it just be fixed right the first time?

Dragons of Autumn Twilight

Wandering through Target (Tar-jeh) yesterday, I beheld I sight that confused, intrigued and quite frankly scared me. I saw a DVD for the animated movie of Weis and Hickman's iconic novel in the Dragonlance universe, Dragons of Autumn Twilight. Being the fan-boy that I am, I had to pick it up to see if the story I knew and loved had been faithfully or atrociously recreated.

And the verdict is:

I've seen worse. This is, in no uncertain terms, a B-movie. Not in the way Evil Dead or Rocky Horror Picture Show are B movies, because there are times when you'll see something so absurd in those that you have no choice but to laugh. No, this is a B-movie in the way Return of the Swamp Thing or Surf Nazis Must Die are B-movies. No redeeming value unless you place your own value on it.

It does stay at least loosely coherent to the book. Some liberties are taken and a few of my more favored moments are skipped. Keifer Sutherland does a good job voice acting for Raistlin Majere. Phil LaMar was an odd choice for Riverwind - but not a bad one. Lucy Lawless - ... well ... whatever. I did say it was a B-movie.

EDIT (1/21/08): I was going to write more about it, go a little more in depth, but I started falling asleep mid-post. So I hit "publish" and went to bed. I'll try to be a little more thorough next time.

Meet the Walt Disney PR Team

After some harping on by Snappy, Baby and I decided to watch Meet the Robinsons. I am happy to say that it is an enjoyable film. Light and fluffy with enough humor to keep you from leaving the couch to do something constructive like wash baby bottles, put away leftovers, do laundry, pee, walk the dog or write a blog post.

But

The merciless beating from the "Walt Disney was a great inventor like Lewis" meme was enough to make me want to drive to O-Town and put two barrels of double-aught buckshot into The Rat's head. And I would've gotten away with it too if it wasn't for that pesky Orange County Sheriff's office and their miserable dog. Well, that and the trespass warning. I really should get rid of that before Sweetie reaches an age where she'll have the cognitive wherewithal to realize that Daddy's boss screwed her over with one simple swan dive from the bridge of the English channel. You'd think the park security would have been more understanding. I mean, they built the damn park in Florida for crying out loud. It gets hot. People are going to want to swim. It makes sense to me ...

I should go check on the dryer to make sure the timer is working. I hope it's not broken. I suppose if it is, the repair guy is coming on Wednesday anyways.

What's this all about?

So here's the deal. Ideally, this blog is open to the public for all to read. Realistically, this blog will be read by friends and family members. I'm kinda OK with that. After all, one of the main reasons I'm doing this blog is because I'm sick of my family telling me I don't keep in touch. Well, here you go. You now have what amounts to a quasi-daily look into my brain.

Now, that last thing I want to do is spend a post everyday describing what happened in the hours since my last post. On top of that, I doubt you'd really want to read that either. Instead, I'll try to highlight a particular moment of the day that's worth commenting on. An instant in time, a photo of my reality.

Oh yeah, and if anyone gripes about my grammar, syntax, or spelling, they will be the first to die. You've been warned...

Time to publish this post and start working on a Daily one instead.

A Fresh Start

As with many things, sometimes you just need a re-boot.

I've decided to delete the old and unused neko-kun blog I had here on Blogger.com and start a new one instead. The name "Facets" is actually what I was going to use for a personal website idea I had. (Ego-site, I jokingly called it.)

So, as the first post, I'd like to welcome anyone with the chutzpa to actually read this site and not comment on my atrocious spelling of Yiddish words my gentile self was never formally taught.

I'll try to jump on later tonight and make a more formal post on something non-boring. It'll be interesting to see if I succeed or not. Both on posting and it being non-boring...